Friday, October 24, 2008

Busy Days

Cierra is competing in a Feis on Sunday at the Red Lion at the Quay in Vancouver, WA at 9:30am...all are welcome to come see her dance!! On Monday she has the opportunity to be "graded" on some of her dances...there are judges here from all over the world for the competition, so they will grade dancers while they are here. She will go for her first 3 grades. If she passes all 12 grades she will have earned an Associates Degree of Dance!

Aspen started a pottery class this week and is absolutely in love with building things out of clay...there wasn't much doubt that she would. She built a castle. If you haven't heard about it she would love to tell you all about it...she has told us all about it multiple times...someone else, please ask her about her castle!

Aspen will have another MRI the first of December...we are working on scheduling that. Orders aren't in the computer, then the orders are in but the computer is down, etc, etc. We'll get it on the books eventually!

I accepted a job with the inpatient pharmacy at Good Sam here in town. I am waiting for my license to arrive in the mail before I can can't legally enter a pharmacy to work without a license in this state. I hope it's a nice position with professional people.

Well, that's just a taste of what's keeping us busy...the usual is still happening, lots of family, church, Folk Dance, friends, and we are starting the wonderful Fall holiday season. I love the season of settling in for the winter.

Thursday, October 9, 2008

20th Anniversary

I thought I should post an update, but I'm not sure what to say. One day I am elated that I only have myself and the girls to worry about, and the next I am so angry I could spit.

Saturday was our 20th Anniversary, not much of an anniversary. It was a horrible, sad day that broke my heart multiple times. I still cry thinking about it.

I am job hunting. I am trying to convince myself it's for me, but it's's really because we can't make ends meet living separately. Ken has always said he would take care of us financially, but if he gets a part time job he won't be able to see the girls. Part of me says that's the price you pay for up and leaving, the other part says it's not fair for the girls. Either way I will walk into work and be sad every day because I have to be there because of this.

We saw a counselor on Tuesday...he's really good, but all I could think about was, "It's a dollar a minute, can't you talk faster?!!" I guess we can't not afford it right now. Ken did agree to try to work on his heart has changed a little.

The girls are doing really well...we actually do stuff together with them. We just don't talk to each other about anything serious, so the girls think it's all good. We've gone for bike rides and bowling and as long as we only talk about bike rides and bowling everything is fine.

Part of me always wants him to suddenly be nice and apologetic, and the other part can't trust him at all because he's broken every promise. It's a frustrating stuck place to be...just waiting...I think I've said that before. Nothing like rounding out a year of waiting with a little more waiting...waiting for Ken to make decisions, waiting for the hurt to go away, waiting to see what happens.